I have a confession to make: I would rather get a good night’s sleep over a good night of sex.
And evidently I am not alone. According to a 2012 survey by the Better Sleep Council nearly 80 percent of women would rather get a good night’s sleep that have sex. Here are a few stats from the survey which definitely woke me up:
- 6 in 10 Americans crave sleep more than sex
- Some admit to falling asleep during sex
- Men crave sex (over sleep) more than women (58% vs. 21% women)
- Women crave sleep (over sex) more than men (79% vs. 42% men)
http://bettersleep.org/better-sleep/the-science-of-sleep/sleep-statistics-research/survey-results
According to a Fox News report on The Better Sleep Council’s “Sleep versus Sex” study ” One reason may be that women do not see intimacy as valuable as sleep. Another reason may be that many of us are so sleep deprived that a good night’s sleep sounds better than almost anything else. A 2007 study by this same group, found that 72 percent of the women they questioned reported trouble sleeping at least a couple of nights each week.”
http://magazine.foxnews.com/love/why-do-women-prefer-sleep-over-sex
The issue of being sleep starved over sex starved came up twice this week in articles I read:
First, Lee Woodruff, a journalist and author whom I admire, wrote an article in September’s Ladies Home Journal revealing that “After four kids and 25 years of marriage, it’s not easy to get in the mood for sex. My husband would disagree”.
Sound familiar, doesn’t it? Here’s the full article: http://www.lhj.com/community/your-stories/lee-woodruff-sex-in-marriage/
Second, the September 17th Wall Street Journal reported that some 10 – 15% of U.S. adults suffer from insomnia which can impact their ability to concentrate during the day. Yep! I’ve been there. How about you?
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424127887323981304579079121055363770.html
During my cancer treatment and breast reconsruction, sex was the furthest thing from my mind. My red blooded husband, David said “Sex was just a number in Latin.” Dealing with body image issues combined with exhaustion from treatment and an extremely delicate sense of smell certainly didn’t make me feel sexy or want sex…..just more sleep.
Today, I have a healthier attitude to my new body and I still enjoy sex. But menopause combined with the prescribed endocrine therapy Arimidex that I take nightly definitely has taken a toll which I will simply refer to as “Low E,” the female alternative to the widely advertised “Low T.” And why is it with menopause that women become damp as a rain forest in some places and dry as a desert in others? My life in my rambuctious 30s may have been “Fifty Shades of Gray” but today in my 50s it’s more like “Fifty Shades of Gray Hair.”
These days, I love nothing more than slathering my dry skin with body and face creams, popping in ear plugs to tune out any noise, and burrowing into my bed and its fluffy down pillows and comforter so I can sleep soundly. Mind you: I still love to curl up next to my husband. Just feeling his arms around me is sexy.
A good night’s sleep and great sex do yield similar beauty results: glowing skin, healthy endorphins and more energy. But being sleep starved versus sex starved can can play havoc on the mind and body. Have you ever heard someone say they can’t concentrate because they haven’t had enough sex? Have you ever woken up grumpy after a night of sex? Doubtful. But we all have woken up on the wrong side of the bed from a poor night’s sleep.
At the end of the day my desire for sleep over sex does not seem to have impacted my marriage or my sex life. I have both a great marriage and also great sex when we both rise to the occasion (excuse the play on words).
It’s really Mind over Matter:
Sex starts with a state of mind. You need to get in the mood emotionally and then physically to make it matter.
Of course I’m awfully lucky to be in a relationship that, when both my mind and body crave sleep, it doesn’t really matter to my accepting husband! I think he craves sleep. too!
You just crack me up!! I would say I am in the majority! Sleeping Beauty was a princess for a reason!! I know I would love the great sex and to feel desired, but as much as my husband also, is a wonderful man…. women are more connected emotionally and as the song says….. ” It’s hard to kiss the lips at night, that chew your ass out all day long”!!! 😉 With that said….. I will take the sleep hands down!!!